


Take Me To Church

by cosima-the-geek-monkey (transgressivelesbiangeekspiral), transgressivelesbiangeekspiral



Category: Orphan Black (TV)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/F, Implied Sexual Content, soccercop - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-27
Updated: 2017-08-27
Packaged: 2018-12-20 15:20:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,490
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11923680
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/transgressivelesbiangeekspiral/pseuds/cosima-the-geek-monkey, https://archiveofourown.org/users/transgressivelesbiangeekspiral/pseuds/transgressivelesbiangeekspiral
Summary: Beth and Alison give into temptation.





	Take Me To Church

_When the woman saw that the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye, and also desirable for gaining wisdom, she took some and ate it._

 

Alison Hendrix and her family sat in the pews of the front of the church, hearing the priest speak from the bible. Alison tried to stay faithful to her Christian faith, never giving into temptation, but at this moment in time, her morals were low. After recently finding out that she has been involved in an international cloning experiment and is probably being monitored right now, Alison spiralled into madness, drinking excessive amounts of alcohol and mind-numbing amounts of pills to block out the outside world and take the pain away. She couldn't even trust her beloved Donnie, and fell into paranoia whenever he said he was going to work or going on golf activities with his work colleagues.

The only person who she felt she could trust was her genetic identical - she looked exactly the same, and it reminded Alison of the dire situation she was in.

She didn't feel pure anymore, she was just another copy, a number. How could God love her when there was countless numbers of her around the world? She was defined by her genetics, not her personality. She wanted to drink and for the world to go away.

"Alison, are you okay?" Donnie tried to put his arm around her but Alison flinched away from his touch and slapped his arm.

She didn't feel anything anymore for Donnie. She couldn't even look him in the eye. She tried to hold it together for her children but she was failing, she really was. The only person she needed to talk to, who could understand all of this crazy madness was out there on the streets, putting her life on the line to protect Alison and her other sisters, even when she too was declining psychologically.

Alison couldn't help but think of Beth, her genetic identical who was out there on the frontline, not only fighting crime but fighting the organisations and the snakes after them. Alison felt that even though her problems were pretty shit, for Beth it was likely to be worse. Neither of the two could trust the people they lived with, constantly looking over their shoulder when they leave the house, scared to put the key in the door when they return home. They found a self-haven in each other, a different place from home, from their lying partners. They found solace in each other and their similarly terrible situations; Alison felt like it was the only thing keeping her alive at this moment.

_Help me stay awake so that temptation won't catch me by surprise. I want to keep on praying so that I won't be dragged away by evil desires. Help me keep my spirit well fed with your Holy Word so that I always remember that greater are you, Almighty God, who is living in me than any power of darkness and sin that is in the world. Your Word also tells me you will provide a way of escape from temptation. Please, Lord, give me the wisdom to walk away when I am tempted, and the clarity to see the way out that you will provide._

_Thank you, God, that you are a faithful deliverer and that I can count on your help in my time of need._

Alison touched her cross necklace as it hung loosely around her neck, and felt the irresistible urge to rip it from her neck and throw it on the floor, watching the beads break and the cross fall to the floor. She had lost faith in religion and everything holy in the world; she was tired of feeling this way, like she's always going backwards. She needed an escape from this world, and the only escape she had was the reminder that she was ****_****__****_********there, still part of a cloning experiment.

 _How crazy it was to be thinking of your own face looking back at you in your mind_.

Alison felt truly disturbed, but at the same time, she didn't care. This world was beyond disturbed, for some people to even think of creating genetic identicals, people who didn't even want or ask to be infertile, to be monitored, to be treated like an object, to be treated as inferior and studied in science labs.

Alison looked at the stained-glass windows showing Jesus Christ in anger, her eyes threatening to melt the glass away. Religion may not be real to Alison Hendrix anymore, but science _certainly_ is.

 

/////////////////////////////

 

12 hours later on a rainy Sunday, Alison stood at the kitchen sink, staring out of the kitchen window at the pouring rain and thunder. A flash of lightning flickered in front of her eyes and she didn't even bat an eyelid, her hands stinging from the red-hot water in the sink. She didn't move a muscle, or feel any pain.

_She felt too numb to feel anything._

"Alison, would you-"

"No Donnie, I will not." Alison replied in a calm voice, spooking not only herself but Donnie too, who stood behind her, cowardly. "I need to get out."

"There's a storm out there Alison-"

"I know Donnie." Alison smiled but it didn't reach her eyes. "I have eyes too you know."

Donnie took a few steps back from Alison, and even began to shake. He didn't want to argue and instead kept his distance, walking away and wondering what was up with his wife.

Alison let out a large sigh as she stared at the dark-grey clouds. She didn't care where she was going, she just needed to get out, not even wanting to drink herself silly in the house anymore as she feared there would be cameras watching as there were at Beth's.

Alison flicked her hands and wiped them on a towel before getting a handbag and placing a large bottle of vodka inside and a bottle of pills before zipping it up. She took a deep breath and sighed. She wished there was other alternatives but she couldn't cope anymore - she felt like she was about to be eaten alive, trapped, and she needed to run away.

"Alison, where are you going?"

"I'm going to see my mother Donnie, is that okay? Or am I not allowed to do that?" She was surprised she was able to stay sober for this long.

"Of course you are Ali-"

"Don't call me that." Alison put her hand up, a face flashing in her mind with piercing eyes that saw right through her. "I'm going now, and please don't wait up for me."

"What about the children?" Donnie pleaded. He hated seeing his wife like this and knowing he could do nothing about it.

"Tell them that I love them."Alison blinked. "And that I'm sorry, for everything."

A tear ran down her cheek as she walked past Donnie to the back door, keeping her head down as she walked past him. She stood outside in the rain, and slowly walked to the car, the raindrops becoming mixed with the tears flowing down her face and hitting her lips, which had been tainted by many nights of drinking prior. She got in the car, and sat there for a while, having no idea where she could go.

_'You can't run away from this, Alison.'_

She remembered Cosima's words from a few nights ago, pleading her to let her in and not keep running to the bottle. _I can, Cosima._

Alison turned the ignition on and reversed out of the drive and down the road, the windscreen wipers blinking away the rain as she attempted to blink away her own tears.

 

//////////////////////

 

Out of all places, Alison could not wonder why she had ended up back here, after being sat in the place just a few hours before. Alison stood at the altar, her hands holding the cross and her fingers feeling every curve, every detail.

_How stupid was she?_

She took a step away, placing the cross back on the altar and placing her bottle of alcohol and pills along with it, looking at the three objects lined up. Now it looked like more accurate. Screw not giving into temptation, she was going to _devour_ it.

Alison was interrupted from her musings by the door opening, the rain pouring down and the thunder booming through the cold church walls. The lightning cast a silhouette on the visitor, who stood with no umbrella or coat, the rain dripping down her face and her hair. Alison did not even need to turn around. She could feel her presence, and began to feel her own heartbeat pounding in her ears.

The person in question slowly walked down the aisle after closing the doors shut with a lock, the rain dripping from her body as she wandered to the body in front of the table, only the church lights and candles lighting her way. As soon as she reached her destination, she took a look at the stain-glass window.

"I didn't think you'd come." Alison spoke, a small smile threatening to appear on her lips.

"I didn't think I would either." The woman replied huskily, putting her hands into her pockets. "A church of all places?"

"I know it's a weird place for a meeting Beth." Alison turned to look at Beth, her eyes dropping to her lips and the rain drops that were slowly travelling down them before looking in her eyes, the eyes she saw in the mirror each morning.

"But we can only do this in secret."

Beth swallowed as she stared Alison right back in the eye and Alison turned back around, Beth's presence electrifying the air around her and sending shivers down her spine.

"What's all this?" Beth gestured to the bottles on the altar, next to the cross, her eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

"I've made it look a bit more realistic." Alison glanced at the bottle of vodka and pills, with the cross in the middle, separating them.

"And here's me thinking I was the only one that's fucked up." Beth scoffed and shook her head, her eyes focusing on the pills of all three. Alison turned her head to take a look at Beth, a small smile on her face before giving into temptation for the first time today and opening the bottle, feeling the burning feeling in her body as soon as the alcohol touched her lips. Beth looked on, not really knowing how she felt.

"Want some?" Alison offered nonchalantly, wiping her mouth.

"We may as well be fucked up together." Beth commented and Alison handed her the bottle, before Beth took a gulp, cringing when she felt the burn down her throat, making her feel like she wanted to gag. Beth began to cough after the swig, and Alison took the bottle off of her, taking another large sip. After her coughing fit, Beth squinted at Alison and frowned.

"How come you're not coughing?"

"I'm used to it Beth." Alison put the vodka bottle down, and turned to look at Beth, who didn't know whether to feel horrified or whether to feel normal about it. _This was normal,_ considering everything the two were going through.

Alison sighed as the pair stood in silence, hearing the rain pulse against the windows.

"I'm tired of feeling numb and empty Beth."

"Me too." Beth replied, placing her hand on top of Alison's at the altar, her hand dangerously close to the bottle of pills. Her eyes lingered on them, but she knew she couldn't go back there again.

On the other hand, Alison didn't know whether the fire inside of her was because of the vodka that she had just downed or because of another hand on top of hers. She smiled at Beth's comforting gesture, her cheeks turning bright red.

"I don't feel like I'm living anymore, I'm just existing. I don't even feel like a person." Alison rubbed her eyes with her hand, messing up all of her makeup along the way. She didn't care - Beth had seen it all before anyway.

"I'm existing with you Alison." Beth spoke calmly. "I'm trying to hold it together but I'm crumbling."

Alison looked down. She knew Beth had it bad, balancing solving cases at the police station along with unravelling their own existence and the conspiracy behind that.

"I shot a woman in cold blood the other day." Beth confessed, feeling like the angels in the church and even Christ himself was looking down on her. Alison turned to fully face Beth, seeing the tears falling from her eyes. Alison ran her hand down Beth's cheek, tenderly wiping her tears away.

"You did what you had to do Beth."

"That's the problem though, she was innocent all along Ali. I shot an innocent woman." Beth began to sob, fully breaking down. Alison hugged Beth tenderly, her hands gripping at Beth's blue jacket whilst Beth's hands hovered over Alison's hips.

"It was an accident Beth. You had no idea." Alison held onto Beth as Beth finally rested her hands on Alison's hips and buried her face in her neck, with Alison feeling the salty tears against her neck. Beth bit her lip to prevent her lips from quivering and from sobbing again.

"I'm living this with you Beth. I'm here. You can always see me, and talk to me. I'm sorry it has to be in secret."

"Thank you Ali." Alison blushed at the name. She hated Donnie calling her it, only Beth was allowed to call her that. Only Beth was allowed to turn up outside at stupid times in the night, wanting to see her. Only Beth was allowed, only Beth understood her.

Only Beth _got her._

The two still stood in their embrace, forgetting how long they were stood like that. The candles burned in the background, illuminating the place of worship whilst Beth laid her demons to rest with Alison. After a while, Beth began to pull away, with both women immediately missing the feel of contact and warmth as they pulled away.

Most of Beth's tears had dried now, and most of her makeup was smudged, as was Alison's. The pair stood in silence, with Beth starting to sniffle and Alison looking at Beth's statue, her shoulders hanging low and her body feeling the burden of all of her problems.

Beth stood there in her slump, sighing and meeting Alison's eyes. They stared at each other for a bit without saying a word, each trying to decipher what the other was feeling.

_Why were we at a church?_

Beth was not religious at all, she actually despised religion. She could understand others looking to it for hope, especially Alison, but Beth herself never believed in it. She never felt welcomed by the church and found them to be cold places. Beth never really felt welcomed by anyone, not even her own boyfriend. Paul was hollow, devoid of showing anything towards Beth, and Beth felt even more hollow.

She seeked something to make her feel real, like she had a purpose to be alive, wanting an electric current to be running through her, because all she felt was dead, decaying inside. She wanted to be loved, to feel loved, to be held, be kissed, for someone to see her the way she was, ignoring all of the bad parts of her and loving her for the person she was deep down. She craved real love, someone who knows that she has burdens, that she has sinned, but still is seen as a saint by that person; and she felt as though she could feel that kind of connection with Alison.

"There's more than biology between us, there's something else." Beth admitted after a long silence, and Alison looked up to see Beth staring intensely at her face, them piercing eyes working to try to connect the dots, almost like she's trying to figure out something.

Alison looked away from Beth's eyes, her cheeks turning a hot red.

_Why did Beth make her feel like this?_

She made her knees feel weak, made her mind feel dizzy. It's almost as if she forgets what she's doing and where she is when she looks back into them eyes.

"Can you look at me?" Beth asked Alison calmly. Alison carried on staring at the floor.

_I want to Beth. I really want to. But I don't want to scare you away._

"Look at me." Beth repeated, her eyes trailing all of Alison's features, spending a few seconds longer looking at her lips. Beth moved closer to her, and Alison felt heat rising up in her chest. She felt like she was on fire when Beth cradled her cheek like Alison did with her before, although this was more intense.

It was longing.

"Can you see me?" Beth whispered, her voice breaking and Alison looked into her eyes, seeing herself in her own eyes. Alison's eyes kept darting from Beth's eyes to her mouth then back up again.

"I see you Beth." Alison replied, her breathing labored. "I see _all_ of you."

Beth began to breathe heavier, pushing her face a few inches closer to Alison's, so close that their noses were touching.

"Can you knit me together, Ali?" Beth pleaded again with Alison, their noses rubbing and her lips beginning to part whilst she cast another glance towards Alison's lips. "Bring us together."

Alison slowly put her hands behind Beth's back, hesitantly around her neck, resting her hands on her neck whilst she placed her lips on Beth's, her body feeling like an inferno was spreading through every corner of her body.

Beth kissed Alison back forcefully, moaning into her mouth as she finally received what she had been yearning for all along.

"Ali." Beth moaned in between kisses, before grabbing Alison's legs and carrying her, their mouths still attached. Beth carried her over to the altar and rested her on it before pushing off the objects that once sat there. The bottle of alcohol smashed, as did the pills and the cross hit the floor, smashing in half. Beth's lips moved to Alison's neck, sucking and biting at it, likely to leave a harsh mark once they were finished.

Alison moaned in delight, her hands caught up in Beth's hair. They began to kiss again and Alison was eager to remove the barriers of clothing separating their bodies.

"Bring us together." Alison moaned whilst Beth ripped the blouse Alison was wearing, leaving the remains of the torn blouse on the floor. Beth took a step back, pushing off her blue jacket and taking off her white blouse over the top of her head, exposing her well toned stomach to Alison, who bit her lip in response. Alison hurried out of her jeans and sat there in her underwear, watching as Beth also took her jeans off, and licked her lips. Beth's articles of clothing were scattered amongst the floor, and she slowly walked over, in front of the altar, stood before Alison.

Alison looked Beth up and down, gripping at her necklace. Her eyes trailed down her body and lingered on her breasts, then down to her ripped six-pack, and imagined how hard it must be for Beth to work for that figure. Beth began to smirk at Alison, who was getting even more lost at the sight of Beth, and out of nowhere, she fiercely ripped her necklace from her neck, the beads flying to the floor along with yet another cross.

Beth drifted closer to Alison, and Alison rested her hands on Beth's hips.

"I want to worship you, Beth." Alison looked up at Beth, seeing her smiling down on her. Beth's eyes glinted and her eyes began to darken with lust.

"Not before I taint you first." Beth moved to the other end of the altar and crawled over it, crawling to Alison and capturing her inside her web. The two continued to kiss with passion and Beth lowered Alison down, their bodies and legs more intertwined by the minute. The stain glass window reflected on the two, as they both officially gave into temptation and sinned, giving into each other, giving themselves to each other.

Both had seen the forbidden fruit, and took a large bite out of it, not thinking about the consequences or what would happen later on, only the now, the candlelight reflecting on their naked skin a mere ten minutes later, and the heat from the pair making the usually cold church burst into flames.

The only hymns that could be heard were moans and screams of pleasure, names on each other's tongues and profanities screamed in delight, echoing through the whole church, beads of sweat slowly falling from exposed skin, Alison and Beth's pheromones blessing the church, whilst the two christen it, slowly knitting themselves together at the altar.


End file.
